Another pregnancy - July 2010

Here we go again. What else can I say. I was actually trying to awoid getting pregnant this month, but for some reasson, we became pregnant anyway. But since I am pregnant, we might as well enjoy the few days of it (that was ironic)


Oh well, it was a biochemic instead.

Lucky me!

My husband think we should give it up. Completely! Darn! How can I stop? I am almost addicted to getting pregnant. It has been my life every month for the past 7 years. I have forgotten how to live "normally". Who am I? What do I do for fun?
I just don't want to have fun. I want to be pregnant and have a baby! A sister or brother for my son! Why give up? I am only 39. I have at least 5 good pregnant years left. I hope. I don't wanna give up.
I feel so depressive after he said that. Like I have nothing (besides my son, naturally) back to live for.
But most of all, I just feel sad, and unfair treated by God, and I feel alone! Sadly alone!
My husband dons't even ask me how I feel anymore, when I am pregnant. He assures me that he loves me, which I believe. But yet I am alone with my thoughts and feelings.


Halloooooooo, anybody out there, going thru the same?

5+4 - Pregnancy ended

well, "what comes easy, goes easy"! 

*crying* *again*

False positive or false negative :) 5+1

First my test was positive, then negative for an entire week; and now it is positive again. and more than it was yesterday. Should I get my hope up? Don't know. I always loose them anyway. But I haven't tried this before.
so what if......?


*S*

5+0 strange and new experience

One should think that I had tried it all. But right now I am facing a new experience. The test has been absolutely 100% negative since I was 4+1, which is 6 days. I have waited for my periode, but it never came. However, pregnancy symptoms are getting worse. How can a test be positive, then negative and then, as of today, suddenly once again be positive. Though it is very very faint, it was positive within 6 minutes. It is to faint for me to picturize it, but still. I am still pregnant. Entering the six week tomorrow.

This brings a small potion of hope into my life. I know it is stupid, because I will loose the fetish anyway. But still. I cannot find anything about this on the internet. No one has EVER written about this experience before.

But af funny thing is, that even though it is such an unique experience, there is actually another girl om Babyklar.dk (Danish site) that is going thru almost the same right now. Her test was faint positive, but never changed. 14 days later it is still faint. Unfortunately I have told her to give up hope. How can she experience a normal pregnancy when HCG dosn't double up, every third day. But she has tried this 2 times before. First time, she had a babygirl and second time, she had a spontaneous abortion. So she has infact every reason to believe and hope :)

4+2

The pregnancy test isn't getting more clear. Still very faint. An average woman would go to the doctor, and they would possible believe she had either a "tube" pregnancy og perhaps even cancer.
But my doctor would just stare and ask: "So what?" They might take a urine test, but they would be able to see the faint color.
I might as well just wait and see, and I don't think I have either cancer or "tube-p".
I believe that my eggs are very old and fragile and that my body just can't produce hcg any more.

But I feel extremely pregnant. Swollen breast, all day sickness, and I am extremely tired - but most of all, I feel very alone. I have never met anybody, that fitted my shoes - which also makes me happy - I would not want this life for anybody!

(graviditets testen bliver ikke tydeligere. Den er ens og grå hver eneste dag. Selvom der dog kommer en ekstra streg indenfor 3 min. Og nej til alle dem der tror at en streg er en streg. Det er det bestemt ikke)

Links

I've found som interesstings links:

http://emedicine.medscape.com/article/260495-overview